Vandalia Middle Schoolers Heads to Capitol City

The Vandalia Middle School went to the state capitol yesterday. We understand they visited the state museum and library. They saw lots of interesting sites and sights.

A few highlights from the trip:

• Blair Scott wanted the capitol tour guide to prove that the glass floor was bullet proof. (There was a local security guard with a gun, yet he declined to participate in Blair's science project).
• The children got to meet with our State Representative Sidney Justus, local vandalia onion farmer. (As his trademark, he gave the students onion sandwiches which his wife made. The students responded as usual).
• And also, as usual, the highlight for most Vandalia Middle Schools students, a chance to visit McDonalds. (Average purchase $3.67 with McLattes being the top purchase after Carol Costas bought the 1st one. Blair Scott was heard to remark, "I can't believe that everyone is buying McLattes just because Carol Costas bought one. They are so expensive and there is hardly any calories in that.").
  

Note from the Editor Regarding Kevin Scott

Well friends, you know that we here at the Vandalia Onions try to respect the privacy of our friends in the community. But I'm writing this entry at special request from our dear friend, Kevin Scott. We have previously reported online and in our paper that Kevin is going through a divorce. We know that it hasn't been easy for Kevin, his wife, or their precious son, Millhouse. (Though you wouldn't know things were bad if you just looked at Millhouse Scott, he is an amazing child, he turns 3 at the end of the month we understand.).

So friends, I received this request from Kevin.

Dear Ed.:

I thought I was fine, but everyone has been really worried about me. Hell, I'm really worried about myself too, so I went and checked myself into HCA South
(it is suppose to be a good research hospital). They upped my meds and even
suggested that I might be suffering from PTS (Post Traumatic Stress).
, well I don't know much about that, but I do trust the doctor
there. And they have an amazing staff too.

Plus, I guess my blood pressure is high too, so I'm going to have to cut back on the chili cheese fries at the Whistleblower Cafe. Gosh, when it rains its pours too (oh yeah, I need to be careful about salt too). I forgot to talk to them about this ringing in my left ear. I've heard the guys down at the rifle range talk about this, but I haven't done much shooting in my life, so it is probably nothing to worry about.

Any way, Ed., I could really use prayers and thoughts.
Frankly, I don't care who knows that I checked myself into HCA South. I mean
I'm almost 40 and the thing I hate more than anything is stigma and the
rumors that get started (It is funny, I think the church is worse about the
rumors than down at the cafe). Sigh, who knows?

I look forward to visiting with you soon.

Grace & Peace,
Kevin

Thanks for the update, Kevin. Enough said, eh? -- Ed.

A Word from Our Sponsor: Ideas for Xmas Gifts

Of course we all know that we are still in the 12 Days of Xmas right now, right?

Well, Sister Sarah from the Reformed Left Behind Church has some great book ideas for Epiphany.

There is the Left Behind Daytimer available exclusively from your RLBC Book Steward.

Some people may not understand why those concerned about being left behind would need a daytimer system. But Sister Sarah assures me that it is necessary and important and the one thing I have learned in this past year is to trust Sarahh. -- Ed.

More Good News

Also, our very own Aaron Farmer has received yet another promotion at The Star. Faithful readers will of course remember Mr. Farmer as perhaps the best intern that the Vandalia Onions ever had. As a matter of fact, Aaron was the guy that first set up the Onions on the computer in the first place. We argued for months and he tried to get me to go with the Apple II and instead I picked the Radio Shack Model 4P, I remember it like it was yesterday. (It seems more like the type of computer that my hero Walter C. would have used).

Anyway, Aaron we are proud of you and I know you are busy, we always enjoy reading your columns that Mrs. MacDonald clips out from Kansas City and sends to us. Young Turk told me that you are on the Internets too. Wow, I'll have to down to the public library and see if they have a copy of that.

Hey, be careful in the big city, Aaron. Oh and where did you get the Goose Island Ale? -- Ed.

Good News Department

It appears that our very own Stacie Who is now working at the God Box in the big city. Frankly, I'm a little surprised because she didn't even go to the church college, but instead was an engineer at State. Hey, Stacie we are proud of you here in Vandalia. -- Ed.

Joys & Concerns

I know some of you in church might have heard that Kevin Scott is getting a divorce. Well, we are all worried about you Kevin and you are in our thoughts and prayers. -- Ed.

Letters Department

Well, we received another letter today from Beatrice Leprea. As always, we welcome letters from our faithful readers and we will run some of them online at the bloggermyspacething version of The Onions.

Dear Editor:

Why are we celebrating Martin Luther King day again? It seems that we just celebrated that last January and frankly I'm sick and tired of hearing about that so called prophet. I mean why don't we have a day to celebrate one of the real heroes, like Martin Luther?

I heard Rev. Roger at the Methodist Church talk about Martin Luther on church last Tuesday night and I'd like to learn more about the first Martin Luther, not that pretender Martin Luther King, Junior.

So please stop running ads for Martin Luther Day Sales from the local Davy & Company and instead darn it, lets talk about the real Martin Luther, like they do in the Methodist Church!

Sincerely,
Beatrice LePrea

Thank you, Beatrice as always for your letters. We always enjoying reading them and I'm sure we will be talking about it at the Whistleblower Cafe. -- Ed.

We are online!

Welcome to the online home of the Vandalia Onions.

You know I've been editor of The Onions for a long time and the guys at the Whistle Blower Cafe have been telling me that I really should get on the Internets.

I went down to the local radio shack and ask young Michael Turk how I could connect the Model 4P up to the internets. (I remember that Carla Denslow's father used the 4P get ag prices over the telephone on their computer too).

Well Michael just snickered at me and told me that I needed to get an iMac or something else and I told him that the newspaper was doing just fine with me typing my articles on the 4P and then giving them to the newspaper outsourcing company who then does the layout and all of that other stuff that Mrs. Rusty used to do for me before she passed on.

Well faithful readers. The young Turk rolled his eyes at me. At me, your editor of this paper for almost 40 years. I thought about writing a letter to his principal, but then I found he graduated early from Vandalia High and is headed to Vanderbilt in June. Starting college in June, who has ever heard of such a thing?

Well, friends a good thing that the owner of the Radio Shack, Mr. Bandwidth took me aside and offered to help. He said that he would even set up a "bloggermyspacething" for free! And all I had to do was give his my articles like I use to give to Mrs. Rusty and he would see that they got on the internets. All I have to do is give him a little ad space online. (I think this must be some sort of scam, but I've known Rich Bandwidth for a long time and he wouldn't cheat me and he knows his stuff, I'll give him that.)

So, the Vandilla Onions is online at last! Your favorite hometown newspaper from your favorite town is on the internets.

We look forward to hearing from you.

Your Faithful Editor